sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Randomize