Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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