I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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