I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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