Yo dont text me then not text me
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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