he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
