idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
