we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
