Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
im holly from the hills drunk
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Everclear isn't food dammit
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
