If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize