The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
