I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
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