It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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