This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize