There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Boobs are out for the taking
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
