You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Randomize
