This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
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