You're completely useless in the revolution.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Randomize
