Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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