i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
