You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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