ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
