3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
So much rum. So many feels.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Randomize