Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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