Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize