I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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