i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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