So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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