I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
