forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
God, you're like boner-b-gone
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
