you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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