I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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