nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
