So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
