Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
