it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Randomize