Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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