Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Randomize
