it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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