That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
