Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
