she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Randomize
