i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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