Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
this is an emotional support booty call
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Randomize
