32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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