To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
