party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
