I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize