This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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