Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
