I smell stomach acid.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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